Adjusting to French standards

     Years ago when we were living in Texas, hubby told me that in certain aspects/standards Malaysians are closer to USA compared to France. I thought he was kidding, there was no way an Asian country is closer to USA than an occidental (Caucasian) country. Now, I think he could be right.

 1. Note pad

     Several days ago I started a new note pad, and I was surprised to find the tiny square layout (left hand side on the photo above). I didn't know how to write on it, should I write within the squares, or one alphabet could be written on three line of squares... I hesitated for a while so I started looking at how people write on this type of paper. There is simply no standard, everyone writes the way they want.

     In Malaysia, after high school,  people pretty much writing on line format (like shown in the right hand side of the photo above), just like in the USA. Years ago my MIL gave me a note pad like the one on the middle of the photo, where it has a big square with three horizontal lines inside. I couldn't get used to it. I found it hard to read writings in these square formats. Wouldn't it save ton of money if note pad producers simply print papers with lines?
    

2. Comma vs Full stop

     In France, a comma is used as a decimal mark compared to full stop in most part of Asia and English speaking countries. So 12.34€ (twelve Euro thirty four Cents) are written as 12,34€. In my job I deal with numbers everyday, I struggled at the beginning but now it just comes by naturally. However, I have to deal with this difference frequently as it produces many mistakes.

a) When working with Excel. I have data coming from different systems, some of them are using Comma standard, the others are using Full stop. We have to use a Macro to turn all these data into the same standard. Sometimes data extraction coming from the same source changed from Comma standard to Dot standard, or someone sends me an updated file which changes all my Comma to Dot resulted in formula mistakes all over the sheet.

b) When using group reporting tools. Our group reporting tools are using the Dot standard. So we have to enter data accordingly. I have many painful experiences being trapped in situations where data entries didn't match the awaiting results just to realize that my 12,34€ has become 1234€ in the reporting system. In one tool, we have an automatic function to feed an Excel file to the system. It has a bug : all the numbers after the decimal marks disappear after loading. The support team told us that it would be too complicate to load these fraction numbers, but we can enter the numbers manually. Hah? How about entering hundred of lines of data manually?

     The map above from Wikipedia shows countries who use Comma vs countries who use Dot or Full stop. I'm surprised to learn that more countries (67) are using Comma than Dot (42). But in terms of coverage Comma standard covers 24% of the of world population, much lower than 60% coverage for the Dot standard.

3. QWERTY vs AZERTY
     France uses AZERTY computer keyboard compare to QWERTY layout in Malaysia and in USA. I get use to the AZERTY keyboard now that I have problem switching to QWERTY layout back in Malaysia. It is easier to type those French accents : é, è, à, ç, ù (only use in one word “où” = where in French)

     Anyway, I’m surprised though to learn that only France and Belgium use this type of layout. The only issue I encounter is when I type in Mandarin using PinYin. For some reason when I switch to Mandarin (provided by Windows 7), the keyboard also switches to QWERTY mode. It is very painful to locate Q, Z, M, A, and W as what I see on the keyboard is not what is shown. I have not yet found a solution to fix it.

     I'm not complaining here, I just want to point out that as an expat I have to constantly adapt to standards practicing in my host country. It is not a problem switching to one standard, it is just painful when we have to juggle between different standards practicing in different countries.

It takes time to adapt : winter

          Over the weekend the temperature has dropped drastically : 10°C in the morning. I was freezing, am still freezing in my own apartment, as it has center heater and usually it gets turned on late October. I was told that maybe some senior citizens in the apartment complex would appeal to our syndicat so that they would turn on the heater earlier than planned.

 

          When I arrived in the office, I was surprised to learn that we are still in summer mode so the air conditioner is on and we have to put it to minimum. How ironic that the temperature inside the office is lower than the temperature outdoor in winter! Some coworkers wrote to our facility manager and the response : the company who handles the heating system has to come and do something, but they will not come until middle of the week because a storm was expected beginning of the week. I don’t think it is a norm here, as hubby’s office has switched to winter mode, but he knows other offices that are experiencing the same thing as us.

          Coming from a tropical country, winter is always harsh for me, but it gets better over years. My moral is still low, I have no desire to do anything, and couldn’t understand how people can claim that winter is their favorite season that they are so eager to walk outside or practice winter sports. My legs used to freeze up even with two layers of pants, but last winter a pair of jeans were enough to put me through the whole winter.

But a walk outside at 0°C with strong wind would trigger a running nose, and I get sick a lot in this season (cough, cold, running nose…).

          I’m glad that the first few years outside of my comfort zone were spent in Texas, where winter was very mild, I didn’t even have big thick coat like I own today. I hope we have center heating system like in Texas though, we just have to put it to 19°C the whole year. We can stay in the cozy apartment and not realizing the weather outdoor. I was told that heater and air conditioner work on two different systems, and maybe center heating is less ecologic, as I have not heard of it in Nantes.

          Anyway, after hearing all my whining, my friend told me that Nantes actually has nice weather in general, I should have gone to Northern part of China to experience the real winter. And in some Southern cities in China, there are no heater during winter.

         Ok, I admit I have not seen the worst, but I don’t think I would want to.

She has two papas

We were playing outdoor when I pointed out a little girl to Aelig.
The little girl and Aelig looked and observed each other.
I continued reading my book, then I heard my daughter telling me : "Maman, she has two papas."
The little girl was entering a house, with two men.
I didn't know how to react, I wasn't expect to talk to my kid about homosexual at this young age.
So I chose the safe way : "Well, the other man is probably her uncle, just like you have a tonton (uncle in French)."

I believe what we parents tell our children will greatly sharp their belief systems in the future.
But, I feel that sometimes what I told my daughter was not entirely right.
For example, at one point, she didn't know how to differentiate between a boy and a girl.
I told her, a boy has short hair. Wrong! There are many men with long hairs these days.
I told her, a boy wears pants. Wrong again! In certain cultures boys wear skirt.
Nowadays she pretty much knows how to judge the gender of kids she encounters.
But she kind of builds up her own judgment : a girl who wears dress or skirt is beautiful, a girl who wears pants are ugly. That probably my fault : each time she wears a dress I would praise how beautiful she is, but I say nothing when she wears pants.

The other day we went to a fest-noz (Brittany dancing party). There was a dwarf dancing. She observed her for a while then asked me why that lady is so small. I told her she was a dwarf, but didn't explain further. A little while later she pointed at the dwarf and threw me the same question. I told her the same answer but I wish I can tell her something more intelligent.

I hope I now how to deal with these awkward moments, for example by coming out with answers that are humorous and educative at the same time. It comes with practices and experiences I guess.

Addressing families : France vs Malaysia

My MIL once commented that she found it horrible that I have to address my sisters by the birth order in my family. France has a long history of fighting against hierarchy in the society, she couldn't understand why we are doing this in families.

Well, I have more than one sister, so I call the eldest one "big sister", the second eldest "second sister", the third eldest "third sister" and so on. This also applies to brothers, uncles, aunties and cousins, so I have people to whom I call big uncle, small aunt (the youngest aunt), third cousin... And since in Mandarin we have distinctive words for people older or younger than you, people from parental side or maternal side,  it is easy to know the relation between two people, if they are related by blood / marriage.

In France, just like in Asia, people address parents and grandparents by their title , but for everyone else in the family they simply call them by first name or last name. It used to be very confusing for me, as when a friend introduced me to, say a cousin, I didn't know if this cousin is from the parental or maternal side, or if he is older or younger compared to my friend. And, it took me some times to accept calling my parents in law by their first name, which in my culture is considered very rude.

There is also a practice that surprises hubby and my MIL : the first thing we say when we meet someone. In France, it would start with a bonjour or salut. In my family, the younger generation has to call out to the elder generation by their "title". For example when I go to my sister's house, my nieces and nephews have to call me "bei yi" (last aunt in Hokkien). And I have to call out to my sister and my brother in laws because they are older than me. Well, how about hubby? He gets to have special treatment as everyone calls him by his first name, else he would be called "bei yi tiung" (last aunt's husband in Hokkien).

When I was a kid, whenever we went to visit someone, my mother would make sure that I addressed everyone in the house (aunt or uncle if not blood/marriage related) before I was allowed to go. Naturally, I try to train Aelig to do the same. But I forgot that in France they don't practice the same things! When Aelig went to visit my office for the first time, I introduced one of my coworkers to her by saying : this is tonton M (uncle M). This coworker immediately laughed hearing me addressing him as tonton (uncle in French). Later he told me that only his siblings kids would call him tonton in France. You just don't go out and call everyone older than you tonton or tata (aunt in French). I was very embarrassed.

Back to my MIL's comment. I was surprised on how she feels about it. I actually love the way I call my sisters very much. Example, let's say my sister's name is Marie, and I tell people that I went shopping with Marie, this could be any Marie, nothing so special. But if I say I go out with my big sister, that's special, because in the whole wide world, I have only one big sister. Besides, elder sisters would usually take good care of their younger sisters.

From my observation, France has its unique practice as well in addressing family members. It goes back to the confusing vous (polite form of you) vs tu (informal form of you). When I asked my French professor how should I address my MIL, she said she would never use "tu" as it is impolite. When I arrived in France, my MIL was disappointed when I use "tu" with her as she thought that I wanted to keep distance between us. So now I use "tu" with everyone in the family, including the grandmothers, to show that I want to be close to them. And then I notice a weird phenomena : everyone in the family would use "tu" with each other except the son in laws. The son in laws use "vous" when calling their MIL. Are they trying to keep distance? How about the neighbors? I feel so close to them so I use "tu" with them but everyone in my French family use "vous" with them. That's something hubby couldn't really explain, just like I couldn't explain to him why Chinese bothered themselves with so many kinship terms to address different family members.

For those who are interested, you can watch a Youtube video about Chinese Family Tree here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCFRoILS1jY#sthash.MWjZMX6E.dpuf

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCFRoILS1jY#sthash.MWjZMX6E.dpuf

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCFRoILS1jY#sthash.MWjZMX6E.dpuf

Going to school with a snail

The school is teaching about Autumn so they asked the students to bring something related to this theme. It also mentioned that if during a walk you find a snail, bring it to school!

So, this poor snail was spotted and taken home by the father and daughter. I gave them an empty cheese box to create a warm home for it. Even though it has holes on the cover, I still left a tiny space between the cover and the bottom part just in case. Guess what? The snail went missing the second morning. However, it didn't escape its fate as it was spotted again and placed in the box. And now it is sitting inside a small aquarium, being shown to the kids with a bunch of its mates.

Personally I would have preferred to bring leaves or a book about Autumn to school then a living animal. I believe every animal has the right to live in harmony with everyone else and not being disturbed. I always tell Aelig to leave those flowers alone so that they could be with their "family members" instead of going to some stranger's home and die.

In case someone is curious, we do not eat snail at home.

Poor thing, I hope the school teaches the kids to not "abuse" the snails in their class.

Going to work with the little girl

It seems that Family Day has become an annual event in my company. They organized it again this year, on a Wednesday afternoon when kids are off school. When I told her about it, she immediately shouted : "Yes, I want to go to work with mummy!"

On the way to my office, to my surprise, she yelled "I have been here!". I'm not sure if she really remembered that she had been here last year, but hubby was convinced. We went to every offices and said "bonjour" to most of my coworkers. She was shy at the beginning but was greeting everyone later.

And then it came the highlight for kids : the snack time! She asked for drinks and cookies, and had no shame to ask for candies later.

We then went to my new office and met up with coworkers who did not work on Wednesday (so that they can take care of their kids at home), but decided to come in to show their kids around. Coincidently one kid was born on the same date as her but a year younger, who was as tall as the little girl. Ok everyone agreed that she is short compare to average kids in France, she has certainly got my gene on this.

We then lingered around my desk while I was checking emails. She ran around looking at people, everyone was kind to her. When I suggested that we should leave for home, she protested :"but I like here!". And then she asked:" Will your boss pay me since I'm working here?". Lol.

Here is the little girl who sat in the parking lot refusing to go home. I guess she had fun.

Bilingual road : Learning at her own pace

I was chatting with my coworker about kids. I was telling her my worries about my daughter's seemingly weak command in French compared to kids her age. She suggested that I should start speaking French and Mandarin at the sometimes with my daughter. She couldn't understand how a family can function like ours, where three languages were practiced at the same time at home.

Well, there were times that I have doubts about what we were doing.

The initial plan was that I take care of Mandarin and hubby takes care of French. One thing I didn't that into consideration was that a mother naturally interacts / handles more things with her child than a father. The outcome was that the little angel prefered to speak Mandarin than French, as she knew more vocabularies in Mandarin. We spent time together singing, reading and chatting in Mandarin. And then I wondered if I have put her in disadvantages compare to her pals at school.

Examples:
1. At school while kids were singing songs that they have probably heard at home, she learned about them for the first time. Well, she did know a couple of French songs but not extensively.
2. She might not be familiar with instructions in French (while doing craft, drawing...).
3. During story telling times she might not understand much compare to her pals due to her weak vocabularies.

I suspected that these have made her behaved reservedly in classroom. While kids in her classroom started to form groups, she didn't belong to any and would usually play with boys or older kids. Her teacher used to tell me that she didn't speak much at class and sometimes didn't understand her instructions. Her after school carer told me that she was a quiet girl. I noticed that she spoke less fluently in French compared to kids her age.

And then this coworker told me: "Well, according to the National Education guideline, a kid that has finished the first year of Kindergarten should recognize 1 to 5. Does she know this?" The true is no. Yes, after one full year of school, she doesn't read 1 to 5. Another fact is that she doesn't know A to Z either. I'm restraining myself to teach her alphabet because I don't think I pronounce them correctly in French. I thought she would pick all these up at school. The coworker continued : "Some days I asked my daughter whether she had to work a lot at school, she told me no they were playing all days. The fact is, she was learning a lot but she thought it was games. They have a talented teacher who knows how to make learning fun, we are very lucky." I hope Aelig will meet a similar teacher, her current one has 33 kids to take care of, not sure if she could handle it.

At that point, I had all these questions to myself:
Should I change the method and start conversing with her in Mandarin and French?
Should I start teaching her writing and reading, even in Mandarin, even though kids here do these formally the first year they are in primary school?

In fact, kids in Malaysia start reading and writing since they enter kindergarten. They have dictations and small tests. I believe kids are capable of doing these before they turn 6. But I do ask myself what the rush? She still have a lot of time to learn. I started learning writing and reading when I was 7.

Before making any decisions, I decided to talk to her teachers. To my relief, her second year teacher thinks that she speaks well and blend in without problem with her classmates. Her after-school carer (the same one from last year) told me that she has improved a lot in term of expressions. And she eats well in the canteen. What a great news!

Now, we will continue the three languages practice at home (she doesn't speak English, she just tries to imitate us sometimes). And, I want to make learning a fun game for her. No pressure, she learns it at her own pace.

Teaching her how to write one to five.

She decides which exercise books she wants to "draw" with. Sometimes she writes a word, I write another one. She doesn't do it everyday.Well, learning is a lifelong process, way to go!

Her feminine side

I caught her applying lipbalm and perfume before going to school.
She insisted to wear only skirt.
To not dirty her white dancing shoes, she wore the black one out, then changed into the white one when arriving in her friend's house. She doesn't want to wear crocs anymore.
She plays with necklace and wristband.
She wants me to tie her hairs the way she wants.

Where did she get all these from? Certainly not from me. I do not do anything she does above.

"From my mum." I heard hubby replied.

Oh, indeed. My MIL did offer those accessories including a pair of ear rings to my daughter.
But, she is not the only one. The sitter gave her perfume as Christmas present.
All these are not a problem, I just feel weird seeing a three-year-old wearing perfume. Isn't it too early?
And, her winter clothes are mostly consisted of pants. Among the limited skirts I bought / passed down from her cousins, some are not allowed to wear to school, too bitchy according to hubby (such as the one in the photo above). So, we have had little scenes in the mornings as she wanted only skirt and I had nothing to offer her.

And, she got so tanned after one month with her grand-parents, with lots of time spent boating.
I grew up believing fair skin is the king. We even have a saying "fair skin hides aways many flaws".
I can hear my mother complains "oh no why got so tanned she is as black as a charcoal!"
Each time I see her tanned skin I just tell myself what a waste! She used to have glowy and smooth skin.
Maybe it will come back after winter.

Two photos on table manner

Found these two photos while researching on table manners.

 

Source
This photo shows men squatting while eating. It is an habit in a province in China.
Well, I have seen many Chinese Ah Pek (Chinese old men), including my father, eating with one leg folded up, rice bowl on one hand and chopstick on the other. I raise my bowl too while eating noodle or soup in Malaysia, but I was told that it is impolite in France. And, I will not be acceptable to eat noodle like the guy in the photo.

Source
Dialog translated in English : You forget the good manner, Fred one doesn't not put the elbows on the table.

I wonder if in France it is acceptable to rest your tits on the table. lol.

Salary increment : How about a week of baguette?

Manager : I would like to tell you that we are very satisfied with your performance. I believe you have been informed of your salary increment.
Friend : Yes.
A blank in the conversation. Apparently the manager was waiting for some form of appreciation.
Manager : Well, it seems that you are not happy about it.
Friend : Well, the increment is equivalent to my one week consumption of baguette, would you be happy if it were you?
Manager : ...(speechless).

As I have mentioned earlier, salary increment is very slow in my industry. Some people don't get any this year, except those who are doing an outstanding job. One year I got a merely 200€ (before tax) annual increment, which could buy me maybe an extra lunch per month? The manager who announced it to me was quite embarrassed to even spell out the amount. So nowadays when I receive a call from HR to inform me this kind of news, I politely say thank you and get on to my life. I don't feel anything for it anymore.

The true is, France has taught me to appreciate other aspects in my life than money. I'm staying because of all the reasons mentioned in the other post that are more important at this stage of my life.

Anyway, I kind of feel sad when this friend told me about the conversation above, as it really happened to him/her.

Another table etiquette

Source

I was talking with my coworkers about the "no clinking of glasses in a crossover manner" rule, and there I discovered another table etiquette.

Coworker:"Often, during dinner,  I have to tell my son to keep his hands on the table."
Me: "What do you mean, why should your son put his hands on the table?"
Coworker:"Well, that's another table etiquette that we learn since we are a kid."

I have never heard of this, neither did hubby. I'm glad his family doesn't practice this. I was imagining how hard it could be for a little boy to have to sit still, hands on the table but elbows off the table. Especially, some lunches or dinners could last forever. Anyway, I'm not criticizing here, it is just hard for a foreigner to understand why these table etiquettes are being imposed.

Before checking out on google, let's have a little fun and guess why this rule exists:
1. In the medieval times, people died over dining table as weapons or poisons were hid under table. To prevent this, everyone should put their hands on the table.
2. To make sure everyone has cleaned their hands before eating.
3. To make sure that no one is flirting around with their neighbor under the table.
4. To make sure no one steals or hides food away.
5. It is a superstition, someone who doesn't respect it would be condemned to 10 years without sex.

lol.

From green apple to table manners

It all started with a green apple.

We had a gathering in hubby's grandmother's house. There was an apple lying down on the grass, not far from the apple tree. It was still green, so it would be left rotten on the grass.

My MIL saw it, pick it up for me as she knows that I like eating crunchy apple. This immediately put my grandmother unease, "that can't be eaten!' she screamed. Seeing how she reacted, I hesitated between eating it or throwing it. Later, I decided to eat it as I didn't want to waste it. While cutting it to check if there was worm inside, I heard my FIL explained to grandma that my family doesn't mind eating apple when it is crunchy and acidly. "They actually plucked the apples fresh from the trees when they were visiting us" said him. "What's wrong with it?", I wanted to ask but I just kept quiet.

This led me to think about another incident several years back when I was having lunch in grandma's place. She offered me some fruits as dessert so I took an apple. She quickly rushed to pick up a knife while I was already taking the first bite. When the knife was handed to me, I looked at it and didn't know how to react. Ok, this might sound odd, but I actually don't know how to cut an apple without a peeler and a cutting board. In my family, we either bite it directly or we cut it into pieces then present them in a plate. While my BIL peeled his apple and cut it into pieces in his hand, I put down the knife and decided to eat it the way I'm comfortable with. I sensed that she was quite disturbed by the way I ate my apple but she didn't say anything.

While thinking about how different we are in eating habits with all kind of flashback to several similar incidents, we started our lunch with champagne toasting. There I was confronted with a table manner, as I was crossing my glass to toast with someone. Hubby nicely reminded me that this is a no no in their culture, that I should not cross my glass over others' arms while toasting. I suddenly burst up and said I do not want to respect a tradition that doesn't come with a good explanation. In fact, nobody ever told me why we couldn't do this. I made the point that eating for me is a pleasure, I don't want to think about all kind of rules that restrict that pleasure. My French family didn't say anything. I felt guilty but on other hand I really have enough of all these rules including the "elbows off the table" rule that I have violated on purpose in many occasions.

When I finally calmed down, I thought about my daughter. I can ignore these manners as I can pretend that I'm still a foreigner, she on the other hand has to know these rules and respect them. But to convince myself I have to first know why these rules existed.

Strangely, I couldn't find much information on the no crossing rule, it seems that it is not a common rule in the western world. One article explains that it is actually a kind of superstition, that a cross could only be made by the priests, and other who makes crosses will bring bad luck to oneself. As a non-believer it is hard to accept this explanation. As for the elbows off the table rule, many articles said that by putting elbows on table it risks knocking off things or bumping into people sitting beside you. Once again I'm not convinced.

I have yet decided what to do. We will see.

French tolerance : The traveling people II

About 6 months ago I blogged about The Traveling People. Guess what, they are still here!

I got back from our summer vacation and I saw more camping cars parked on a piece of land in front an office building. We pass by it almost everyday while walking to lunch. I think the land was too packed, some of them decided to settle down in smaller lands close to our office. Now we can see kids running topless, women doing laundry (they got washing machine) and dishes, people eating...some kids even climbed to our floor and observed us from outside.

It seems that our office area was not the only one attracted them. They also spotted a big piece of field close to offices and restaurants. One group settled down on a land right in front of a housing area. I don't know how the residents take it.

I was amazed how they manage to find water and electricity supply in empty land. This group invaded the area, some parked their camping cars next to pedestrian walk. To avoid them we had to walk on roads. One afternoon we were dining in a restaurant just beside the land, we saw the owner asking the driver of a camping car to leave same space between the restaurant and the camping car. The driver said he was only staying for two days, but the owner insisted that he moved further from the restaurant. Well, he just ignored her.

Kids from the group playing on the pedestrian walk. It is back to school time but it doesn't seem that they go to school.

Frankly, they looked just like someone who are on vacation.
It just that, their vacation lasts longer than majority of the population.
And, it seems that they are staying.
And, finally some reaction from our property management : we were informed that due to the present of traveling people in the area, the access to buildings are now secured with a digicode (instead of pressing a button).

Back to school

In France the school year normally starts during the first week of September.

The little angel woke up early in the morning, all excited to go back to school.

When they arrived, they had to make up the bed for her afternoon nap.

This year the teacher has to handle a mixed of 4 and 5 years old class. She has her hands full I would say.

All the stationery required at school.

A focus on the slate. I had never used this at school but hubby said in France students use it since very young age.

This is how they use the slate in class. Everyone writes the answer on the slate so that teacher could easily knows who got it right and who got it wrong. Maybe in several years they will be using a tablet?

I wish her a very happy school year.

Morning Ritual III

Here I'm, 4 years later, writing about morning ritual III, after morning ritual II.

Several months ago, we moved to a new office with open space environment. That was when I decided to establish my own rule for the morning greeting : air kiss with women, hand shake with men. So every morning, once arrive in the office, I go to greet everyone, have a small talk before starring at my computer and keep pressing the keynotes (my mother's expression, that's how she sees people working in front of a computer lol).

Well, at the beginning some men were a bit confused, as they actually do the contrary : shaking hands with every man and air kissing every woman. But little by little, they get used to it.

I'm glad I made this decision. I read a woman's blog (a Chinese married to a French), after several years of air kissing her guests, she decided to just stop. She didn't appreciate the ritual, now she is just telling everyone that she doesn't "faire la bise". Some people were shock, but gradually they accepted it. I found this to be too extreme, but I admired her gut to tell people what she actually thinks.

This only applies to office environment though. I can accept air kissing people outside of work in informal occasions. Maybe one day I will accept to air kiss my male coworkers. It actually happened. One day, I don't know what got into me, I just went to air kiss a team mate, naturally. I think that was because I start to treat him like a friend, a good sign I guess.

Baguette = Pain

I was cleaning the kitchen counter top and it just dawned on me that in French, bread = Pain. It suits my feeling for the French bread : a pain in cleaning.

Hubby is a big fun of baguette (a long load of French bread), that you can buy easily in the bakery (except in Aug when some of them are having their annual leaves). He can swallow one in within half an hour, spread it with some butter, cheese, ham... I like it too, but not at his level. He has passed down the tradition to Aelig, these days she is not satisfied with plain butter, she wanted cheese too.

Back to my rant.

This evil scrumptious bread has crispy crust. It lasts for two days then it becomes stone hard.

Since we have baguette at home regularly, its crusts are on the counter-top, on the floor, on the dining table, 24/7. Ok I exaggerated, I should deduct the two minutes after cleaning, but it would just come back as soon as someone goes to the kitchen and take a bite of baguette.

Since it doesn't last long, we have to store it in the freezer. So, in the process of getting it out, you have bread crust in the freezer, on the floor, and worst, inside the toaster and on the counter-top that hosts the toaster (well, you need to thaw it before eating right?). And to not waste the ones that turned into stone before we could save them, I need to put them aside so we could feed them to ducks in the park nearby.

Since changing someone's habit is more difficult than climbing the stairs to the sky (a Chinese expression),I have been looking for a solution, and been observing how other families do it.

Ginger is spicier when it is old (another Chinese expression), after many years of experience, my FIL came out with a conclusion :  you need to cut and eat the baguette on the dining table, then take the table cloth to the garden and throw those crusts, the birds will clean them up later. True, his sparkling clean counter-top lasts longer than mine, but that's because they don't eat baguette as often as my family. And he cleans his counter-top 3 times per day.

Now, we don't have a garden as we live in an apartment. It is unethical to throw breadcrumb just outside the window I guess? Someone bought us this planche à pain (the one in photo), yes it does store the breadcrumb, but you still have some on the counter-top so now I have to clean the counter-top PLUS the planche à pain.

It seems that it is hard to find a solution, or one that suits me. I prefer American sandwich bread (pain mie) but hubby would probably throw me out of the window if I suggest this to him. So I have two options:
1. Clean as frequently as possible the counter-top just like my FIL
2. Close an eye on the breadcrumb and move on with my life.

LOL.

Oh boy oh boy

During the long weekend, we had gatherings with friends, so the little girl got to play with kids around her age.

We were having picnic around the Erdre river. Now the adults can chit-chat non-stop since the kids can play by themselves. She didn't even complain when I took a baby in my arm. When she was younger, she cried and nagged when she saw me holding someone else rather than her.

Going to the beach and play with kids is of course different than being the only kid and playing alone.

She learned how to accept refusal. She placed the towels nicely and invited her pals, but they ignored her as they preferred to sit somewhere else. She didn't take it badly, she was just disappointed.

It was fun watching them playing. They would just stare at each other and laugh. They were wrestling, jumping, running around, then laugh. So easy to be happy.

She had a lot of fun, so did we.

Who don't go for vacation?

I watched on TV that around 40% of French do not go for vacation this year. Tied budget is the main cause for this phenomena. A sociologist calls it as injustice between the poor and the rich.

This is a topic that pops up on TV every summer. How many percent of the population didn't go for vacation, how much on average they spend on their holidays, where are the hottest destinations... Well, a topic that I don't see in Malaysia.

The first time I heard about this I thought this was not a big deal. Stay at home during school holidays, I did it my whole life. The more I'm in France, the more I see it : vacation is in French's blood. It is a right, not a privilege. Not going for vacation is a big deal, as everyone around you is going. To the beach, to the mountain, to the South (South of France, Italy, Spain, anywhere with a better guarantee of sunshine), to a foreign country.

So now we are talking about injustice to people not able to join the wagon.
"Too bad for them", that was what I thought the first year I heard about this.
"If they want to go for vacation, they need to work for it." My thought on second year.
"That's ridiculous, how many countries in the world can have 60% of the population going on vacation?" My take the year after.
"That's too much, there are asking for donations so that kids can go for vacation!" I cried out to hubby.

And then I have Aelig.
My perspective has since changed.
I would like to see every little angel in this world going for vacation with their love one.
I'm willing to donate my "cheques vacances" to anyone who need it.
I'm grateful that my family gets to go every year.

Aelig on vacation in Perhentian Island.

Her vacation continues in France...

Bonnes vacances everyone!

Where is great-grandma?

Sometimes there are things I don't know how to explain to Aelig.

We were in Malaysia, and my mother informed me one day that she was going to be busy as it was my grandmother's death anniversary (做忌). As a Chinese custom, my mother has to hold a memorial service for the ancestors from my father's side. 

The day came, she woke up super early to prepare foods for praying. My grandmother was represented in a wood frame (神祖牌位) with her name written on. I told Aelig that we were going to pray for my grandmother, who is her great-grandma. She asked me where is great-grandma? I showed her the wood frame, she was very confused. 

I helped my father laying out a praying table and presented foods my mother just cooked. My father then lid some incense and passed them to me. I was a bit confused as he didn't give any to Aelig. Was it because she is not considered a descendant from his family? Anyway, I explained to Aelig that I was inviting my grand-parents for lunch. Apparently during the death anniversary the death spouse is invited too. Aelig looked around, it seemed that she was trying to spot my grandparents, but in vain.

 After a while, my father threw two half-moon shape woods (擲筊) to communicate with my grandparents. If one wood is facing up and one facing down, it means that they are well eaten. It was the case at first try, the ceremony is considered conclude and the family can start eating. 

"Where is great-grandma?" After I told her that great-grandma has eaten and has gone, she posted the question with her curious eyes. I don't know how to explain that it was in a form of spirit and normally we won't be able to see them. Anyway, after some discussions with my family, we all think that this is just a tradition that we continue. It is served as a day we remember a family member. After all, our tradition believes in incarnation, my grandparents should have already reborn since long time ago, there is no way they could turn up for lunch lol.

One of the praying foods : fried glass noodles.

The main dish was popiah, a popular dish among the Hokkien. It was mainly made of jicama, a kind of vegetables that I have never seen in any Asian stores in France.

Side ingredients that go with the popiah.

The concept is similar to Fajitas (Mexican dish), but it has less meat and less oily.

I hope grandma enjoyed the lunch. I did!