9th months

Two days after she turned 8 months, she started to crawl. Now she is venturing into every corner she could reach in the apartment, we need to constantly keep an eye on her.


We have no choice but to put her in a closed playground. She does not stay too long inside, she yells and yells until we come to pick her.


We added French green bean to her diet. You can see that she loves hams, they were added into her mashed potatoes.


She loves to be carried around, so it suits her well to sit on daddy's shoulder.

The highlight of the month is of course her first long distance trip to the Jura Mountain and Switzerland.


She slept most of the time during the journey. When she woke up she got great-grandma on each side waiting to pamper her.


She fit well inside daddy's backpack. She is ready to go hiking with him.


Discovering hiking with us in the Jura Mountain.


Arrived at the destination after 1.5 hours. Bravo Aelig!


Crossing the French border towards Geneva Switzerland. This was the first time both Aelig and the 89 years old grandma visited Geneva. Hubby and me had been there in 2009 when my family visited France.


Posing at the lake Les Rousses overlooking Switzerland.


Visiting a cheese factory. See how many cheeses are stored here for fermentation.


The cheese girl.


This is not an advertisement. Anyhow, if you would like to hire her to endorse your product, please contact me. :-)


Four generation: great-grandma, grandpa, daddy and the little Aelig. She is a lucky girl to have so many family members who love her dearly. The next milestone in her life is to fly over to Malaysia to be with another group of family members. Another family reunion in her agenda!

Doggy bag in France: yes or no?

I found it funny that sometimes I could do things that hubby won't simply because I'm not French. He won't do it because "ça se fait pas" = not a common practice in France.

Example, our grandma treated us to a fine Indian restaurant during our vacation. Both of the grandmas are not big eaters resulting in a lot of leftover. We finished their plates but there were still lots of rice untouched. Those were very delicious rice and I didn't want to waste it. When the waiter approached us, I nicely requested a doggy bag and he agreed immediately.

Once the waiter left, one grandma told me that she would never asked because in France they do not ask for a doggy bag in restaurant no matter how much food left. They all admired my courage to do this as they think it was the right thing to do.

Well, sincerely I do not see this as problem. I know it is not common in France, but I would rather ask then waste the food, plus the waiter could very well rejected my request if he felt reluctant. Instead, he properly packed the rice and it served us well for the next dinner.

We don't always have to do what the French do, do we?

They worth our respect

Despite the car incident, we arrived safely in Divonne Les Bains and had a splendid time hiking around the area.

I would like to pay my respect to both hubby's grandmas: one is 80 and one is approaching 90. They hiked with us on the Jura Mountain. Together with them we did several hiking and managed to have magnificent view including the Mount Blanc.


Grandmas making effort and following us up to the mountain.


She had some problem with her feet, each step brought her pain but she didn't give up.


A little victory gesture à la Malaisienne when we arrived at the destination.


We are rewarded with a breathtaking view!

Talk about bad luck!

We were supposed to be in Divonne Les Bains today for our one week precious vacation in the mountain.

Things didn't turn out as planned, our car broke down on the way there. Smoke coming out from the engine and we thought the car would caught in fire. It was 3am, we were cold and tired with a baby and two grandmothers. Our insurance sent a towing car two hours later. They sent a taxi to pick us up and booked us a hotel in another city closeby. Since it was the weekend, the Renault garage was closed, and the insurance agent had a hard time finding us a rental car, everything was fully booked. Finally, a taxi sent all of us back to Nantes.

We will try again with my car tonight. Wish us luck and hope we could restart our journey uneventfully.

8 months + 5 days

During the week after putting Aelig to sleep, I'm usually exhausted, thus didn't manage to post when Aelig turned 8 months. Trying to catch up here by summarizing her achievements and milestones from 7 to 8 months.

Food

So far, she has tried:
Ham, sausage, potato, carrot, zucchini, leek, eggplant, melon, banana, strawberry, apple and plum. She accepted all of them even though sometimes her face expression showed that she didn't really enjoy them. This photo shows the strawberry banana combo hubby prepared for her.


Hubby brought her to pick some strawberry. She ate several, here is the proof!

Movements & positions

She could sit still without support now. This photo was taken during our day trip to Pont Aven. We were picnicking with friends and she was playing alone.


She loves playing in the garden. I can see that she is an outdoor girl.


We could now go shopping with her since she could sit well in the shopping cart.


Shortly after she managed to sit in a balance way, she discovered that she could turn to her stomach and raise both her hands and legs. Since then she has lost patient in sitting, as soon as we put her on the floor she moves on to the crawling positing.


And now she wants us to give her our hand to support her standing up. I love the moment when she takes my hands and looks at me anticipating me lifting her up.


This weekend she found her way to be on her knee in her crib. She is very happy with this new position. Now I'm worried, how long will it take before she figures out how to climb out from the crib and....fall?

Sleeping pattern
The first week we put her in her own room, she was sleeping well but still woke up around 4am for feeding. The second week I believed she was being disturbed by the new skills and positions she acquired, as she woke up frequently on her crawling position, crying. Last week, she slept through the night most of the time, woke up once at 5am and once at 6am, and went right back to sleep after feeding.

I'm proud and elated at all her achievements. I keep reminding myself that I need to treasure the time with her since she is growing so fast, very soon she will move around all over the place and we have not done anything to childproof our apartment yet. It is time for action!

A company farewell party

The last day I was with my company in Malaysia, my boss brought me and my coworker to a private club to enjoy a delectable buffet lunch.

One week before I left my company in the USA, my managers organized a farewell lunch with our team members. They also offered me a photo album with my name carved on the front page. All these were paid by the company.

Things are different in France. Most of the time the person who is quitting will organize a farewell party (pot de départ) in the company pantry or meeting room, he or she will bring in some drinks and snacks. The coworkers will then start "an envelope" to collect some money among themselves and use the money to buy something for the person leaving.


I had the opportunity to participate some of the farewell parties and contributed to the envelope. This time, it was for my manager's manager, someone with whom I worked directly with and someone whom I admired. Let's call her C here. I was heavyhearted to learn that I would no longer working with her. C decided to become a school teacher and, envisaging to have time for herself, for example taking adult piano lessons.

This time around, I was the one started the envelope. I sent an email to the mailing list (by first removing C) and informed them where they could contribute their part. I suggested everyone brings in a family photos but nobody replied. Later I found out from a coworker that a family photo is private and she didn't feel like giving it to a manager. Well, after talking with many people outside the team, I figured we could take a team photo as a sentimental souvenir. I felt that our team members were not motivated, so I shared this idea to another manager. With his support, I conveyed the message to everyone and I got one pitiful reply out of 100 people. To diverse C we asked a manager to set up a meeting with her during the time we were taking the photos. I was afraid we wouldn't have enough people showed up, but to my surprise, more than 40 people turned up. At right at that moment, C arrived with her car seeing all of us gathered in the parking lot. Well, there go the surprise!


Even though I worked with C for more than 2 years, I realized I do not know her well outside of the work context, thus having a hard time figure out what presents to buy for her. Eventually we talked to her husband and found out that she wanted a piano. Well, a piano was way out of our budget so we bought her a piano bench (tabouret piano in French, a new word I learnt). With everyone's contribution, besides the piano chair, we got her a Hello Kitty pencil box with some pens, two team photos and a Yves Rocher gift card (for facial, massage...).

C, all the best to your future endeavors. Bonne continuation!

I don't want to work because...

My coworker was so irritated today that she complained about the French social system in front of me. Apparently, she received an email from her husband saying that their house keeper is quitting. When asking her why, her reply:"I can not work over 15 hours a week else I will lose my stipend from RSA."

This coworker earns a good living and her husband works like crazy as he is holding an important position. Due to their above average household income, they need to pay the maximum prices for most of the services for children: canteen, childcare, extra-curriculum activities...and her housekeeper is only three years older than her. Her point is, they are in the high income group but they work hard and pay a lot of taxes, which end up helping these people who want to work minimum. These group of people will complain about their shrimpy retirement even though they are the one at fault since they prefer to work minimum when they are young.

Listening to her, I could only smile. This is one of the fundamental problems of the social systems. Every helps start with a good purpose, but it couldn't prevent people from abusing it. A good control is necessary, but how to distinguish someone who couldn't find a job (thus should get minimum help) from someone who prefer to work the least possible to be able to receive help?

The name confusion

Some coworkers were working with some Chinese and some Indians and they were talking about how their names confused all of them. Here went the hilarious conversations:

A: You know it is very tough to work with the Chinese.
B: Why?
A: You don't know what their name actually are.
B: How's that?
A: There is this guy who's name is Zi Zhang, how am I supposed to know whether Zi is the first name or last name.
B: So what did you call him?
A: I called him Zhang and he replied, but later I found out Zhang is actually his last name.
B: Ops.
A: There is simply no way to guess which one is the first name.
B: You know same things happened to me when I was working with the Indians.
A: What happened?
B: We were in a conference call and I kept asking questions to this Indian guy but he never replied.
A: Why?
B: Each time I asked a question, I said "so Siddiqui could you please confirm this and that" and nobody answered, but I recognized his voice, he was there. Then I realized his first name was actually Apurv, since I was calling him with his last name with a French pronunciation, he didn't know I was talking to him.
A: Ops


I was sitting next to their office and their conversation made me smile. While it is confusing for the French to distinguish the first from the last name for the Chinese and Indians, it was confusing for me as well to identify the first name from the French's. Sometimes a common first name could be used as the family name, for example Thomas, Vivien. There are regional names that I had never heard of and some of them do not follow the usual French pronunciation. For example, most of the time you do not pronounce the S when it is situated at the end of a word, but there is always exception to the rule: for Mme Le Pous you need to pronounce the S because it is from the Brittany regional.

Well, life is a continuous learning experience.

Passport

Aelig has her own passport!
The application process was so fast and efficient. It was probably done in 5 days but we went to take it 10 days later. I thought it was going to take 5-6 weeks so was happy to discover the speedy processing time. Now we could bring her anywhere outside France. Plan in process: Switzerland in Sept and Malaysia next year!

Here are the papers that you need to gather to apply for passport for a minor:
1. Application form (could get it from the Town Hall or their website)
2. 2 photos (could take it from any photographer or directly with the Town Hall)
3. Application fee (in stamp form) = 17 euros with photos, 20 euros if the photos are to be taken in the Town Hall
4. The livret de famille (French family book listing the married couple + kids)
5. Any document that could prove the French nationality from any of the parents
6. Any paper that could prove your current address

When filling the form, we didn't know what to put for her eyes' color. Sometimes her eyes are blue, sometimes they are brown, sometimes they are mixed color. The officer approached Aelig and had a close look, she said we might want to put "other". Eventually she entered a color that we predict to be the right one in two years. We shall see in two years if our prediction is right!

The end of breastfeeding

Aelig was with her grandparents for a week. I use this opportunity to totally stop breastfeeding. I had some engorgement at some point but it went away quickly. When we went to pick up Aelig, she emptied the last milk stocked and since then I do not sense any milk coming. Well, it is time to stop.

The weaning process took around 3 months. I went back to work when Aelig was about 3 months old. I intended to continue breastfeeding as long as I could, but it was too tiresome to have to wake up early in the morning to pump and handling the storage in the fridge. I provided milk to the sitter but it only lasted for one month then my milk supply dwiddled. Since then, I breastfed every morning and evening.

Here is the electric breast pump set I used. I rented the machine from the Pharmacy and I paid 0 for it. The French government paid for the rental which costed around 12 euros per week. :-) Thanks S & A for lending me the equipment & accessories, I was braver to try out the electric pump since I had these handy, and the manual one didn't work on me.


It took me so long to wean as emotionally I was not ready to let go the precious moments I had with Aelig, then she refused to drink from a bottle during the evening. She expected me to breastfeed her. Thing took a turn when my coworker introduced me to one type of bottles with the teat imitating the teat from a breast. Gradually, she get used to drinking from a bottle at home. Since then, I only fed her to put her to sleep, and now she could go to sleep without breastfeeding.

What a journey! I was afraid I won't have enough milk at the beginning but I did. Expressing using an electric device + storing were totally foreign to me, but little by little I got familiarized with it. The first time I pumped, I got the pitiful 10oz. With perseverance my inflow doubled. I thought I would never be able to go through the weaning process, but mentally I was ready and so did Aelig. I'm elated with the result. The only big inconvenience I encountered was when I had to be away: I still remembered having engorgement when I was watching the Moulin Rouge show in Paris. I had to press my breasts from time to time to release the pain. Here was the result when you do not breastfeed for one day: 6oz of milk expressed in one go for the first time!

The milestones towards 7th month

We celebrated Aelig's 7th month today.


As usual, we bought her a cake, as soon as we put it in front of her she tried to grab it with her hand.


She crossed through many developmental milestones this month, most obviously her first two teeth are popping out! We didn't notice too much problems during the teething process, but the sitter said she bites constantly so we rubbed some gel on her gum to ease her pain.


One of her favorite movements now is bouncing up and down. She is so active that we adult have to take turn holding her while she bounces, we all ended up with sore arms. Another movement she achieved: flipping over back and forward! Well, my mother said in Malaysia babies usually able to do this at 3 months, so Aelig is considered late in doing this. Sometimes she cries in her crib bcos she flipped over and forgot how to turn back.


We finally bought her a stroller, she looks comfortable in it.


Last several week it was very hot so we only put the diaper on her. We also let her play on the grass, she learnt to sit down by holding the grass on both side. Bad idea though to let her played on grass without clothes, she developed a rash later on but it disappeared after two days.


I still cannot believe, her grandparents let her slept in their rooms for 3 nights! Well, my in laws had never let any of their children slept in their room, I thank them for making the effort and accepting Aelig in their room. They got waken up during the nights and couldn't went back to sleep, poor them.


She called me mama several times! Later on she called papa as well (hubby is still bitter about that haha). A very important milestone for us parents, is that we are moving her to her own room today. Hope she enjoys her first night alone. Bravo Aelig for all the achievements so far! Now, let's scoop on this scrumptious looking cake shall we?

The bicycle challenge

During one of my BIL's birthday, hubby offered his brother a book: The Nantes Brest Canal. Since then they had been talking about doing this Canal on bicycle, something that I couldn't foresee myself doing. Last week, they finally put in action, concurring the 420km journey from Lesneven to Nantes within 4 days.


The guys, their bicycles and luggages along the road beside the Canal.


The bicycle is having a break.


They camped on the roadside. I don't think I ever dare doing this in Malaysia, the changes to get robed is too high!


Passing by the splendid countryside.


Canal boating is quite popular along this Canal.


There are many locks to help boats passing through the uneven water level


Another lock, some people decorated it with flowers.


Bicycling, bicycling, bicycling... for 4 days!!


Love the tranquil scenery.


They made it, I'm very proud of them!

Introduction to solid food

In Malaysia when kids start eating solid food, they usually have rice soup cooks with some potatoes, carrots or tomatoes. One year ago I had no idea what babies eat in France, now I start to have some ideas. The most common baby food are those come in jar in the form of puree, which you could find in supermarket with different favor: vegetables or fruits for young babies.

Aelig's baby sitter showed me the brand the other baby was eating, and I was going to start feeding Aelig with it. However, hubby has his own plan, he chose to prepare Aelig's food himself, it makes sense as it is more healthy and economical.


The day she turned 6 months hubby fed her some mashed carrots and ham, she took them all without problem.


When we finished the first batch of mashed carrots, hubby proceeded to introduce her mixed vegetables: zucchini, potato and carrot, thoroughly cleaned and peeled.


The vegetables were boiled and then grinded using a traditional food mill. This food mill is from hubby's grandma, so I think it is pretty old.


It yielded quite some purees for her, this could last for at least one month.


We borrowed some small jars from my MIL. We give her one jar per day.


All jars are sealed with plastic bags and stored in the freezer compartment in the fridge.

The result of the solid food introduction is imminent: her stool changes from liquid texture to paste texture. These days when I feed her, sometimes her face turns red and I see her pushing, then she would start crying. As soon as I remove the stool from her she would be a happy baby again.

I think we should prepare her some fruit purees: bananas, apples, strawberries, or maybe some durian? lol

When you want to yell and say arggghhh

Arghhhhh, such bad luck!

Last Friday I received a letter from the company health insurance partner saying that they are downgrading our health coverage due to the skyrocketing cost over the years. I didn't know how it affects us until I see the coverage for laser eye surgery: they now only pay for 1000 euros a year per eye! Argghhh, they used to cover 100% of the surgery for both eyes in the same year, I know of two persons already from the company grabbing this good deal.

I have been wanted to go for this surgery even since I know that the company supplementary insurance will take care of all the costs. I got hold up because my BIL who happens to be an optician told me that there are some side effects so I better look into them first before going for the surgery. Then I got pregnant and during the pregnancy and 4 months after delivery one could not go for it since the vision changes during this period. Now that I'm ready for it, I got this letter and the downgrade will take effect starting the 1 of July. The cunning company! They only allows us one week to react so it is certainly too late for me.

Someone recommended me la Clinique Sourdille in Nantes for this surgery so I went to their website to see how much it costs to perform this surgery. I simply chose a doctor and in his website it states that it could cost anything from 1000 euros to 1480 euros per eye depending on the technology using. Sigh, it means that I still need to chip up from my own pocket and could only go for one eye per year.

It is the moment I want to yell and say arggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!

She is six months old

Another milestone in her life!


From six months on we could start feeding her solid foods. In the health book (carnet santé, every kid will have one in France) it states that apart from milk she could try out some mashed vegetables and fruits, daily products (yogurts, cheese) and meat. However, since one of the parents is allergy, our doctor advised us to only give her egg, celery, nuts and fish after she turns one year old.


We bought this cake for her but of course eventually it ended up in our stomach. It was super delicious! Anyhow hubby cooked some mashed carrot for her and she also took in some hem. So far so good.


I still breastfeed her in the morning and during the evening as she refuses to drink in bottle before going to sleep. It seems that she understands at home she could have breast milk and at the sitter she could only have bottle milk. Anyway, from time to time when I run out of milk or during the weekend we still feed her in bottle and she drinks very little compared to when she was in the sitter's place. In the past when she wanted to stop drinking she would play with the nipple but one day she decided to shut her mouth, firmly. It cracked us but at the same time it was annoying because she always decides to stop when there are only 10 to 20ml left. Is it possible to teach a baby that she needs to / has to finish her milk / food?


We also discover many ways to make her laugh. She loves to be held high and fly to the sky. When we do this she would burst into a chain of laughing.


I finally managed to clear up her crib, it was taken by whole bunch of clothes and toys. We let her play in there but she still sleeps in her bassinet beside our bed. At this point, I still hesitate to put her in another room, as it is more practical for breastfeeding (she still wakes up during the night for milk) and it is so sweet to be able to see her the first thing in the morning. We will probably send her to her room once she starts sleep through the night.


I will certainly miss this scene whenever we move her crib to her room. One day she will be in her bed and we will be in ours, no more co-bedding during a nap.

I'm certainly not in rush to move her out. She grows up so fast I would really like to treasure the moment with her as much as I can.

Daycare or baby sitter?

We got a call from the Town Hall saying that the daycare center close to our apartment has a spot for Aelig in September. It comes to us as a surprise as we applied one year ago and didn't think that they would have an opening for us.

It is a tough decision to make. The advantages for the daycare are that they are very close to our place, literally just down the street where we live, and financially it is a lot cheaper compared to having a babysitter. Besides, Aelig gets to play with a bunch of kids which would help develop her social skill since her young day. By the time she turns 3 she will be well prepared to go to pre-school.

On the other hand, we have a babysitter who helped us through the tough time, who is flexible with her schedule and most importantly, she loves Aelig dearly even though Aelig could be quite difficult compare to another kid she is having.

Well, we need to reply them the latest tomorrow so a decision has to be made tonight.

Hubby and me both lean towards keeping the sitter as we think the most important factor to consider is that she takes good care of Aelig.

Falling in love

We started land hunt again. The project was put on hold last year when I was pregnant.

We saw this piece of hand, I felt in love with the scenery, but we are not getting it.

Imagine sipping a beer in the porch enjoying the picturesque landscape after a long day at work.

Unfortunately, it comes with many negative points. There is a power line passing through the land, right above where people are supposed to build the house as the remaining of the land is for agriculture purposes only. Plus, the countryside scenery is facing north so there is unlikely we will build a porch against the sunshine. The other issue that disturbs us is that this land is situated in a historical town so chances are we will have strict rules to follow when building the house.

Well, the hunting continues...

Is childcare free in France?

A while back someone commented that childcare is free in France. This is not true. As far as I know, you can get many form of helps from the government but at least 15% remain at your own charge.

If both parents are working, there are several childcare options, the most common ones being putting your kid in a government / community runs daycare center or hiring a baby sitter.

Apparently daycare is a cheaper option but it is difficult to get a spot. In our community, we have 3 daycares with about 70 spots, considering that every month we have on average 15 newborns and daycares are open for kids from 0 - 3 years old, it would be very lucky if you get accepted since the first try. I do not know what are the selection criterias, we enrolled since Aelig was 4 months in my stomach but we didn't get accepted.

So, we opted for the second choice: a baby sitter. We got a list from the Town Hall and tried to contact some of them who lived in our areas, but a lot of them do not work on Wednesday, or they do not want to work after certain hours. We consider ourselves lucky as after browsing through the list, only one was still available. To have more choice, I called the Town Hall and got a contact of someone who just got certified. We got a nice feeling with her during the interview and decided to "hire" her. Ever since, she has been magnificent and supportive, she helped us through the difficult period when hubby hurt his ankle. We are very blessed to have someone who adores Aelig and who do not mind working long hours.

So, how much a baby sitter costs actually? That was a question I asked before having Aelig. It depends pretty much on your household income as the government does provide some helps to finance the childcare. There are two principal rates : gross wage per hour and maintenance cost (water, electricity etc) per day. Our sitter charges us 3.80 euros an hour + 2.81 euros per day. She takes care of Aelig 45 hours a week which translates into 741 euros a month. She has to pay for her part of social charges which is around 170 euros per month. Her net income = 741 euros - 170 euros = 571 euros. As her employer, we pay her net income plus the maintenance cost of 2.81 per day. Overall, we pay her around 630 euros every month. The government takes care of 100% employer social charges (retirement, medical care; work accident, unemployment insurance...) which results in around 300 per month.

So, we have an outflow of about 630 euros a month for childcare services. However, depending on your household income, you might get some inflow as you are qualified for childcare stipends. For household who does not earn more than 43365 euros in 2008 with only one child to support, you could get the basic stipend = 177.95 euros a month until the kid turns 3 years old. Besides, there are 3 categories of stipend specifically for childcare, ranking from 167.07 euros a month to 441.63 euros a month. No matter in which category you are, a minimum of 15% of the sitter net income is on your charge.

I hope this information could provide some helps for people who do not read French. We got a booklet when I was pregnant and it explains very well all kind of helps you could get. For those who could read French you have more accurate and updated information on the government website
here.