Sunday, May 13, 2007

Mother's day

Today is Mother's day in Malaysia. I didn't call home. I called on Thursday and I don't know what to say today. Wishing my mother a happy mother's day? It's really hard to say this kind of thing. It was not a big event in our childhood, no we were not taught to design a card for mother. This day is being commercialised, and only recently, my family go out and have a nice treat for my mother. The only gesture I made was when I was in highschool and the school was selling carnation for a fund raising event. So I bought one and just put it in a vase. Then my sisters were making fun of me, telling mother that I bought the flower for her and was not dare to say anything.

Whenever we try to do something on mother's day, my mother's typical response:"You guys don't have to waste money doing this for me, as long as you don't make me angry I will be fine. " Yes, typical Asian mother who doesn't want the children to spend money on her. My father's response is totally different:"yes let's go feed our stomach hehe".

All these years living abroad I have learnt to not tell her sad news but just reporting good things happening in my life. Sometimes I'm afraid to call her bcos she will be asking what I'm doing and I don't know how to respond. Whenever she knows I'm still studying French she will be sad and said all these years studying is just a waste and now I'm sitting at home or doing flower picking job which is totally a waste in her eyes.

I'm very jealous of my sisters who can live close to her or always go visit her. But when I call, she would tell me that she is mad at them due to some tiny little thingy and then they will not talk to each other but later they will make up and then go into the dispute-make up circle. She's always in dispute with someone, either my aunt or my father or my sister in laws or my sister or even my nephew. All these years I don't know how she feels about me, but when she cried at the airport I realised she does care for me. She might have anticipated that once I'm flying away, there will be no turning back. Just like indicated in my name, the beautiful swallow, will one day fly away.


  1. Parents will be parents- mine measured how big my job title was to the education i took.
    What they didn't realise is that in Europe, a big job title is not important - even worse, it is seen as being big headed! People do not go big-eyed just because of a big job title. Job titles matter little-tht's my experience.

    Asian parents still care about what people say. Tbeean you must try to learn to please yourself first. This is your life now. It's different living in another country, but you did it for love, nobody said it would be easy.
    Hang in there.

    At least you were offered a job - how little you think of it, it is still something.

  2. I think my mother is more sad about me than what others said. It's the fact that we study hard wishing we can secure a better job or job that we like. At this point I don't mind for any small jobs but if it's for long temps and in situation where I need those money to feed my kids it will be very sad.